LessThanOurTweets

Friday, February 15, 2008

This Weekend in Running: 5 Fearless Predictions

We here at Less Than Our Best are concerned with very little. One of those things is interesting chicken fight matchups, the other is acting like we have some expertise in predicting things. Since we have yet to meet anyone who knows how to correctly predict the future with any reliability, we will assume that we are the only ones who have that kind of insight. After the jump, five things that WILL happen this weekend:

1) Ladies and Gentlemen, your U.S. World Cross Country Team (in no particular order and excluding sore sports like Ryan Hall who are going to "sit out" Worlds):

-Dathan Ritzenhein (might seem obvious, but he has been training on his anti-gravity treadmill for the last month, and I hear San Diego... has gravity)
-Jorge Torres (remember when he was the only distance runner in a final at the 2003 world champs? what a sad sad world we used to live in)
-Anthony Famiglietti (Sly and the Famiglietti Stone, you might say, is doubtful to run World Cross... well he's also doubtful to do anything you'd expect him to)
-James Carney (how can you not root for a carney? They're the consummate underdog, they smoke, they don't button their cut-off flannel shirts in the summertime, AND they run 27:43 virtually unnoticed by the American running community)
-Andrew Carlson (NUTS. Now that I have your attention, Carlson
won the New Year's Emerald's Nuts 4 miler in a Central Park record time)
-Jason Lehmkuhle (What can I say, I like this Team Minnesota squad. The Midwest is great)
-Ryan Warrenburg(mansteinsilvermangoldburger)
-Louis Luchini (
Ryan Hall, Grant Robison, Ian Dobson, Louis Luchini, Adam Tenforde, Don Sage, Seth Hejny)
-Daniel Mazzocco (I once saw him eat a steak made out of beer cans)

2) Rupp runs 8:13, thinks of a wonderful thought, flies away.

3)
Steve Sheer, runs 3:56.04, (3:56 is the new 4 flat) beats 1 of the top three (Meyers probably, or Willis or Sullivan) scores one for us uncoached, unsupported on-our-owners.

3b) Despite running 3:55 to beat a solid field, people continue to spell Sheer’s name wrong.

4) Ugly salmonella incident mars lesser known USATF Invitational, a track meet for chickens held concurrently to the Tyson Invitational at a location on the other side of Fayetteville campus.

5) Jeremy gets rather inebriated Saturday night and, once again, confuses bjw’s bed with his own - “on accident,” according to him (again).

So there you have it: money in the bank. You can thank us later - ie. after you visit your bookie, and have something with which to thank us.


No comments: