Friday, June 6, 2008

Fearless Predictions: Prefontaine? Never Heard of 'im. Edition

Less Than Our Best is concerned with very little. One of those few interests is how a man can look cool dancing. The other is acting like we have some expertise in predicting things. Here's a few things that will LITERALLY happen this weekend:

This weekend we get to revel in all the glory that is Steve Prefontaine. For a change. That is, unless you've ever walked into a running store, own Nike shoes, or have seen the back of a high school cross country team's t-shirt.

With any luck we will hear announcers like Larry Rawson wax poetic about how tough 'ol "Pre" was and that opponents would have to bleed to beat him (must have been a weird site to have three runners covered in blood on that medal stand in '72, HEY-YO!), and of course how he never gave anything less than his best. It's like the Thanksgiving Day parade for all that is douchey about distance running, and Nike is Macy's. And the drum major that leads the parade. And Santa Claus at the end. And Matt Lauer trying to act like the damn thing is exciting to experience.

Luckily, there are some good races to watch as well, if I don't throw the remote through the television.


1) Jeremy Wariner exorcises some demons in the 400 by breaking Michael Johnson's meet record (43.86) and totally dominates the last 100 meters of the race. It's not a suprise that Wariner bounces back so well here. After all, he did once lose to this guy just three weeks before he won the World Championship gold in 2005, and that guy is British and WHITE! Talk about embarassing.


1) After a strong start to the day, my fantasy team goes 2 for 2 (Bekele and Defar) and then quietly slinks into the bottom half of the rankings. Former champs "Katie" and "Jeremy" get humbled into 3rd and 4th place while the jolly ginger "Jesse" jukes and jives his way to a much deserved victory, narrowly pulling away from "Bryan" who proceeds to generate conspiracy theory rumors against us via his far more respected (and viewed) blog optimal training. As for "Hutch"? Poor guy never had a chance...

***Wanna get in on the "fun," enter the LTOB fantasy track contest and win a flippin' prize!***

2) Let's go through the rest of these event by event:

M400 - LaShawn Merritt wins and runs .04 seconds faster than Wariner does at Bislett. Wariner, after watching via live web feed, goes out on the town in Bislett and drunk dials Clyde Hart, sloppily begs Hart to take him back.

M800 - Canadian Gary Reed gets out kicked first by Khadevis Robinson and then by Nick Symmonds in the last 50 meters. Canadian athletes go on strike. No one notices. Except the Versus network.

M1Mile - Komen wins. More importantly, Lopez Lomong beats Alan Webb to get second. It doesn't matter though, Webb "still working on his base, has yet to do speedwork." (that quote guaranteed to be uttered during press conference)

M2Mile - Shaheen, Mottram, Ramzi, Lagat, Solinsky, Koech. That is the order they will finish Sunday....backwards. Did I just blow your mind?

M10000 - Bekele is off record pace by 6000 meters. Wins in 26:55. Complains there was too much wind. If only there were a time of day that was cool and usually windless... Abdi runs 27:45, says he's just wanted to get his Olympic A standard.

W800 - Shannon Rowbury w...i...I just can't quite do it. Mutola wins for the 53rd straight time and performs requisite 'suck it' gesture. Rowbury finishes 2nd unfortunately. She'll have her day.

W5000 - Kara Goucher runs 14:51, begins to hate Shalane Flanagan.


Jesse said...

While the ginger remarks are a bit harsh coming from an all boy school graduate, I do think this could be the week I put it all together and get my first and only "W" of the season.

hutch said...

Well, I for one predict that people will continue to enjoy being name-dropped in written articles, regardless of whether or not said article forecasts their imminent failure.

Thanks Wietman.

Chad said...

As the story goes, Pre told his teammates they were naming a street after him in Coos Bay and one of them chimed in, "What, fourth street?"

Jesse said...

That sounds is my team crashing and burning.